Comparison is the thief of joy.

Waiting for the results, checking the website again and again to see if it is published. It was 2 years ago, when our SSLC results were to be announced. And then in the afternoon, when the results were finally out, I screamed,shouted,jumped and I can’t exactly describe how I felt that day. I had got 97.12% and I was happy as hell. Maybe there’s no other feeling in the world than achieving something we worked hard for. I was so happy that I didn’t care about my fellow mates’ scores. I thought I might have topped the school. Well, it didn’t matter even if I had not. Or so I thought. Later in the evening, I learnt that 3 of my friends had scored more than me and eventually I had not topped the school. Afterwards, for whatever reason, my happiness began to wear off. Why did that happen? I was like the happiest guy in the world just a few hours back! Is the feeling of achievement inversely proportional to time? It didn’t take too long to discover that the blues I was experiencing inspite of such a fantastic score was due to the fact that 3 of them had scored higher. Why did that matter more to me?? Why couldn’t I have just focused on my own grass…??

Its because we all have a tendency to compare. Our feelings of contentment are strongly influenced by it. This tendency seems to support H.L.Mencken’s definition of a wealthy man.

A wealthy man is the one whose income is $100 a year higher than his wife’s sister’s husband.

So, no matter how much we ever achieve our goals, if we have this tendency to compare, we will never have ever lasting happiness. So, what’s the cure for this disease? Sadly, there is none.

We all have it and its inevitable BUT we can use this tendency in a positive way to increase our overall level of satisfaction in life.

Dalai Lama in his extraordinary book ” The Art of Happiness ” says…

Constant comparison with those who are smarter, more beautiful, or more successful than ourselves tends to breed envy, frustration, and unhappiness. But we can use this same principle in a positive way; we can increase our feeling of life satisfaction by comparing ourselves to those who are less fortunate than us and by reflecting on all the things we have.

I might wanna share this quote at last..

I cried because I had no shoes, until I met a man with no feet.

The grass is obviously greener on the other side, but you know what? That shouldn’t bother you at all. 🙂

With lots of love, with you on this journey, Madhusudhanr.

 

Advertisements

14 thoughts on “Comparison is the thief of joy.

    1. thanks so much 🙂 yeah .. we already have more than we ever wanted to be happy. yet we compare with others, hoping that earning as much as they do, looking like them, talking like them, being like them, will make us happy.!! I’m glad you liked the post 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  1. What a great blog and so true, comparison does steal our joy! We must realise there’s always going to be someone, stronger, faster, has more knowledge than we do. Accept yourself for who you are and move on!!
    Reblogging on simplyetta! 😉

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I did that constantly! I made myself miserable! When I discovered this little truth I was sad and kicked myself for all the time I had lost!

    Yet, I’m sure I had many, many people trying to tell me this truth, but I just wasn’t ready to hear it! I felt misunderstood!

    I hadn’t reached the point where I boldly proclaimed that I had suffered enough, that I didn’t need to keep beating myself up because I felt I was deserving of the troubles!

    Our brains can be strange that way!!

    Peace,
    Tamara

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m glad that you have finally reached the point where comparison makes no sense. Hope you live your life happily without comparing it to others’ life. Have a great day 🙂

      Like

  3. That is true, I read this many years ago and it has kept me grateful:

    Someone will always be smarter. Their house will be bigger. They will drive a better car. Their children will do better in school. And their partners will fix more things around the house. So let it go and love you and your circumstances. Think about it. The prettiest woman in the world can have hell in her heart. And the most highly favored woman on your job may be unable to have children. The richest woman you know—she has the car, the house, the clothes—might be heartbreakingly lonely. So, love you. Love who you are right now. Tell yourself, “I am too blessed to be stressed.”

    Author: Unknown

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah.. You are obviously right!! 🙂 I remember a quote “I’m too busy working on my own grass to notice if yours is greener” how awesome our life would be if we just follow this quote. Ain’t it? 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Let me first congratulate you for your awesome SSLC result. Great post. Comparing what you have got with something better can totally ruin a perfectly happy moment. ” I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man with no feet.” Maybe if all of us started thinking how fortunate and blessed we are, compared to several others, we can experience a sense of gratitude and stop wallowing in misery.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you ! :). Yeah exactly ……. We ain’t born blind, we ain’t handicapp , we have a roof over our head , food , everything… But still some choose to focus on what’s not been given to us by god!! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s